Topic
Body Shame
The midlife body image story, separated from vanity. What the research says about it, and what helps.
April 28, 2026
I Can't Feel Pleasure Anymore: What's Actually Going On
The flatness has a name and a cause. And for most women in their 40s, it lifts. Here's where to start.
April 26, 2026
The Obligation Sex Cycle: How to Break It
If you've been having sex to avoid conflict rather than because you want to, you may be in the obligation sex cycle, a pattern that quietly erodes desire and makes recovery harder over time.
April 25, 2026
Is It Normal to Not Enjoy Sex Anymore? An Honest Answer
If you've been quietly wondering whether the loss of enjoyment in sex is just what happens, the answer the data gives is more useful than the cultural one, and it's not what you think.
April 25, 2026
The Nervous System–Libido Connection: A Deeper Read of the Mechanism
If you've read the standard 'stress lowers libido' line and want to understand what's actually happening, this is the longer version: the dual control model, parasympathetic capacity, and why most desire interventions miss the mechanism.
April 19, 2026
Responsive vs Spontaneous Desire: Why You're Not Broken
If you never feel like having sex until you're already having it, you don't have a low libido. You have responsive desire, and it's completely normal in long-term relationships.
April 8, 2026
Feeling Disconnected From Your Body After 40: What the Research Says
Many women in their 40s describe feeling like a stranger in their own body. This isn't vanity or midlife crisis, it's a real and well-documented phenomenon, and it can change.
November 22, 2024
How to Feel Sexy Again: A Realistic Guide for Women in Their 40s
Not 'spice things up' advice. Not tips designed for 25-year-olds. What actually works when you're in your 40s, in a long relationship, and starting from zero.
November 15, 2024
Your Nervous System and Your Libido: The Connection No One Explains
The reason you can't 'just relax' into desire isn't willpower. It's physiology. Here's what's happening in your body, and how to work with it.
November 8, 2024
Responsive Desire: What It Means for Women in Long-Term Relationships
You don't feel like it until you're already doing it. That's not a problem, that's responsive desire. Here's why understanding the difference changes everything.
November 1, 2024
Why Desire Disappears After 40 (And Why It's Not What You Think)
Most women in their 40s experience a significant drop in sexual desire. Here's what's actually happening, and why it's not a personal failing.
Free
A 5-minute body shame practice, by email
One email, right now, with a practice tied specifically to body shame. Plus occasional posts on this work. No spam, unsubscribe anytime.